


I wish we could’ve lasted longer.

by joonsxylophone



Category: Kpop - Fandom, NCT (Band)
Genre: F/M, I Made Myself Cry, M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:34:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26443510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joonsxylophone/pseuds/joonsxylophone
Summary: Illness takes over and you wish things could be different but you can’t change what has happened.
Relationships: Nakamoto Yuta/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	I wish we could’ve lasted longer.

**Author's Note:**

> I HAVEN’T PROOF READ THIS BUT ITS CONTENT SO IDC

6.45 _am_

He was in the bathroom. It was like clockwork each morning but he insisted it was nothing to worry about. The doctors begged to differ but Yuta simply stated each time that he was feeling better. The prescriptions and treatments weren’t working. 

* * *

_9.23 am_

Appointments and checkups. It was worse than either of you expected. Anywhere from a year to five. Could try various other treatments again but they were unlikely to work. He seemed okay initially but broke down later when nobody was around. He wasn’t ready for the worst.

* * *

_11.56 am_

_You_ decided to start keeping a video diary. Yuta didn’t disagree, He knew neither of you had time for those silly arguments anymore. He was apprehensive about it at first though. What was the point? It was just going to make you upset in the future. _You_ didn’t want to forget how you felt now. 

* * *

_1.32 pm_

_”Life is beautiful.”_ _He said_ happily looking up into the camera lens. _His_ eyes reflected the bright rays of the midday sunshine. _You_ were both in the woods, breathing in the crisp autumn air. One of the first dates you had was here but youtried to pushing reminiscing out of your mindset. Living in the present was what was needed right now. 

* * *

_4.19 pm_

Rain spluttered against the window in what felt like a mocking manner. So much was planned for each day that youfelt like you were wasting them away when the weather wasn’t cooperating or when different things were cancelled. You broke down into his arms. _He_ knew how you were feeling. All the time in the world but none at all. The situation was bitter sweet and the irony hit hard.

* * *

_7.28 pm_

_He_ was sleeping a lot again, which was okay. _You_ liked seeing him peaceful like this, it was comforting. These days it felt like he worried about everything when he was awake. Sleep gave him relief. It wasn’t just sleep that hewas doing a lot of recently though. Presents were becoming frequent. The things being bought weren’t cheap either. Money held no value anymore. _He’d_ say with each trinket or jewellery piece “Treasure it, okay?” and you’d hit his arm gently, knowing that you would do just that.

* * *

_11.08 pm_

_You’d_ never really spoken about having kids until now but you both wanted them. It’d be cruel to bring one into the world now. The amount you both cried that night could’ve filled an ocean.

* * *

_4.16 am_

No one ever said the dwindling process was easy but someone really could’ve informed you about what was going to happen. _Pure helplessness. You_ knew your friends and his family was going through the exact same thing. When his memory started getting worse is when the pain truly began to hit.

* * *

_8.46 am_

_It_ happened on that day. You remember it clearly. Holding an umbrella you were walking home, _He’d_ been spending time with his parents. _Your_ heart dropped as soon as your phone rang. Everything else was just a blur. 

* * *

_10.20 am_

_He’d_ been in hospital for two weeks before everything went wrong. It wasn’t his fault, but you hated him for succumbing. People came to visit you for weeks after but it just didn’t feel right. _You_ felt truly alone for the first time in your life.

* * *

_1.15 pm_

_It_ was months before you brought yourself to look at anything that reminded you of _him_. When you did you wished you hadn’t. It broke your heart all over again. It was the little video recorder that you looked at which sparked so much emotion. All the memories, things you did together, the love you felt for each other.

There was a video. Just of him. Smiling and telling you all about how he felt about everything.

” _I’m sorry, I’ve given you false promises of the future and i can’t forgive myself. You truly were my first and last love and even though i know i won’t be here forever i want you to keep living, and i want you to continue loving the world the same way you always did,”_ He laughed through the tears which spilled down his cheeks ” _If you don’t i’ll come and haunt you!”_


End file.
